Life as an act of worship

"Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour." I Peter 5:8

"I have told you these things so that you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33

"The Lord gives strength to his people, he blesses his people with peace." Jer. 29:11

"Come let us bow down in worship, let us kneel before the Lord our Maker, for He is our God and we are the people of His pasture, the flock under His care. Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts..." Psalm 95:6-8

The word 'worship' is used 250 times in the NIV translation. The word is used for two purposes: 1. to describe how, when and why we should worship (either through historical accounts or through instruction)/ 2. to tell us what NOT to worship.

Reading the above verses in order helps remind me of the progression my thoughts should take as I consider my life and any event within it.

With each thought and interaction with the world, I need to be aware that I am a sheep, and the devil is prowling the outskirts of the the flock, waiting to pick off a stray. I need to be alert not only for my own protection, but for my husband, my children and my family in general. I have to remember that each person God has brought into my life is family, and he expects me to love them as I myself desire to be loved. This can start to seem overwhelming. But wait...

Christ has overcome the world! This truth is like going in to diffuse a bomb, KNOWING that it won't detonate. Whatever trouble I face, the end result is covered on my behalf by the creator of the universe. I mean, come on. How can I worry about a conflict or a painful day when the Almighty Being who took dirt and molded it into a living, breathing, walking, talking, thinking, feeling human being has my back? No sweat.

Not only that, but God promises to give me strength and peace. What's that? I'm sorry God, but this deal seems too good to be true. First, you've gone ahead of me and revealed the achilles heel of my enemy. Now you're telling me I get your strength and peace straight out of your personal stash? Really? Why me? I'm just... me. Well, if you can love me like that then-

Daddy, I will bow down in worship, kneeling before the Lord my Maker, for you are my God and I am a sheep in your pasture, in the flock under your care. Today, as I hear your voice, I will not harden my heart, but leave it soft and pliable in your hands, to shape as you desire. I thank you God for your choice to let me choose you, but to not make me fight for you. While you could have sat up on a summit we would never reach, and seperated yourself from the filth of our sin, you didn't. You rolled up your sleeves and said these are my kids. If they're gonna roll in the mud, then I'm gonna give them a bath. You washed us in the blood of your Son. Because of your choice we can choose to live in your Word and to live out Your Spirit. We can choose Life. Thank you for your Gift.

In Jesus Name, Amen

Notice how the Psalm 95:6 ends with an admonishment to choose to not harden our hearts. Essentially, it goes right back to I Peter 5:8. This is what God revealed to me as I sought him over the topic of worship as a life choice. And here's my conclusion:

If it is not an act of worship, it's NOT worth doing.

So now it's time to evaluate the schedule and get out the big honkin' pruning sheers and start cutting.

As Matthew West put it, "This might hurt, it's not safe, but I know that I've gotta make a change. I don't care if I break, at least I'll be feeling something. Just okay is not enough. Help me fight through the nothingness of... life. I don't wanna go through the motions. I don't wanna go one more day, without your all-consuming passion inside of me. I don't want to spend my whole life asking, what if I had given everything?"

Self-control or Excusing Thy Self?

There are many, many scriptures which tell us self-control is a desirable quality to possess, but how does one obtain it? This question has been pondered much over the past several weeks as I've evaluated my ability to master myself. I've made no conclusions as of yet, except this one. It begins with submission.

What??!! Submission!!!! I won't do it! (followed by the crossing of arms, stamping of foot and sticking out of bottom lip, mixed with several heavy sighs) For many it is such a terrible word, because in a way, it means surrendering all control. How can that be? Could learning to have control of ourselves begin with first surrendering complete control?

Picture this: a guide dog begins as a puppy. This puppy has specific needs and desires. He believes himself to be the master of obtaining those needs and desires and exhibits this belief in several undesirable behaviors. He rushes in to get the food, practically knocking over his master in the process. He jumps on everyone who walks in the door, thinking this will get the attention and petting he so desperately desires. He roots in the trash when no one's looking, thinking he will get a treat. He ends up with a tummy ache.

At some point, with love and guidance from his master, the dog chooses to submit to the training--even the uncomfortable parts. He sees there is greater benefit to submitting than to going his own way. At this point, he learns the necessary skills to not only survive this life, but to be successful and purposeful. Once he has completed his training, he has learned to control those early urges to fulfill his desires in his own time, by his own methods. He has learned to wait on his master. He has also learned to lead and protect those who cannot do so for themselves.

He could not have done this without first submitting to the training which honed his senses and taught him there are better, greater and more valuable things at hand than just food and a pat on the head.

Now back to us. I've found that submitting for me finds its reality in choosing to sit with the Word, in the presence of God, on a daily basis. It means choosing to come to the one and only true God--the only One who knows what tomorrow will bring, before acting on my emotions. I do not always adhere to this form of submission and when I don't, I find that I am corrected.

Correction is good. The Bible says so, and if I am honest, I find that my own life verifies this as fact. Without correction, I would not be moving closer and closer to this fruit of the Spirit called self-control. But it is not easy.

Often, I find myself feeling like my spirit is literally being torn as I war with myself. I am decisive and once I've made a decision, I fight with everything I am to make it come to fruition. In these moments, God is telling me that if fruit is what I desire, then there is another path I need to follow. "The good trees are over here, " he tells me gently. "You don't want these. They're picked over and only the rotten fruit is left." Will I follow him? Can I trust him?

Trust is really the issue here, isn't it? In order for us to submit, we need to first know that we can trust God. His Word promises that he will never leave or forsake you (Joshua 1:5); that he has plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans for a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11); that you can do all things through His strength (Phillipians 4:13); that He is truth (John 14:6).

But how do you know that you can trust His Word? Try it. If what you're doing is not helping , not leading to positive resolutions of problems in your life, give God a shot. I promise he won't miss. Don't give into the temptation to make excuses for your behavior. Often Satan can give us some pretty big obstacles which seem like a reasonable excuse to behave however we choose instead of how He desires. Make no mistake though, this is still just an excuse. However, when you submit all decisions--all of your life--to God, you'll find yourself accepting the benefits of the fruits of His spirit, including self-control. Better, stronger relationships are among the best of these benefits.

This truth is what I've discovered over the last 9 years being a follower of Christ. Never has He taught me more on this topic than the last year. Why? I've chosen to submit to Him more than ever before. I've brought nearly every question of value to him and tested it against His word before deciding on an answer. I've waited for His peace before moving forward. I find myself more filled with his Grace and less apt to lack control over my emotions and negative temptations. I expect this will continue as long as I continue to submit.

Have you considered the strength of control you have over your reactions lately? Have you asked God how you're doing in this area? Maybe it's time.

"Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control." Proverbs 25:28

"Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the Grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed." 1 Peter 1:13

Pain sucks--get over it.

Most, if not all, of you know that I've struggled with pain the majority of my life. Not paper cut kind of pain -- as annoying as that is -- but debilitating, can barely breath, I'm going to puke or pass out kind of pain (may my college profs. forgive me for my lack of hyphens).

People ask me how my back is doing, and it's just too depressing to tell them that it's really my neck, shoulders, hips and entire left leg in addition to my whole back that hurts every day, all day. It even makes its way into my dreams. It's one of the those ongoing issues that seems like Mt. Everest.

However, what God has been telling me is that my pain entitles me to exactly nothing in His presence. It still doesn't even come close to the pain that Jesus went through to purchase my ticket for preferred seats in eternity.

Furthermore, it does not give me the right to grumble, gripe and complain and thus create a negative environment in which my family must live. I am not allowed to whine about it. I cannot keep making excuses to avoid the short-lived pain of working out because it will move me away from the long-term pain with which I currently live. I am not allowed to look forward and worry about what tomorrow will bring. The weight of tomorrow's possibilities will surely bury me alive.

So what can I do? I can pray and pray and pray and pray some more. I can trust that God will answer my prayers in His timing with the perfect (yes, I said perfect) solution--as in it won't be a problem anymore. Will I always have pain? Probably. But it doesn't have to be a problem. How strong is my faith? This is the question whose answer has value. It is this answer I will seek. What about you? What is your Everest issue? Are you ready to take it down?

Matthew 17:20 He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." (NIV, emphasis added)

Wading through the stuff

Have you ever looked at your life like an ocean,
Saying, "What clear, beautiful, blue water!"
Or is it more like a swampy, nasty potion,
Complete with all sorts of yucky matter?

Maybe your life is average like most--
A river with all manners of "small" pollution.
Or perhaps there are times you could boast
The yucky stuff, and times, that beautiful ocean.

The latter is where you'll find me
Wading through the stuff of life.
Sometimes gorgeous as far as the eye can see,
Others you could cut the pollution with a knife.

"Why," you might ask, in the nicest of tones,
"Is it sometimes one, and then the other?"
The answer is that each trouble hones
My ability to love my sister and brother.

Without life's troubles, I fear I would be
Someone without the knowledge of bad and good,
A person who lacks kindness and sympathy
Like a car with no engine under the hood.

"How," you might ask, ever so sweetly,
"Could hard times bring forth such caring?"
God's answer is that trials will increase greatly
Your endurance against relationships tearing.

Each trial and trouble you wade through
Builds muscle and strength and most of all joy,
'Cause as you look back at all of the sticky goo,
You realize you're stronger than some cheap toy.

You're made by God, filled with His breath,
Made not just for fun, but with a purpose,
Which will not end until the day of your death,
Yet out of His Love, even death He kept from us.

So since He sent His one and only Son,
I'll keep wading through all this stuff.
I'll keep my eyes on Him and call it fun.
Somewhere in the midst of it all, I'll find myself tough.

Tough enough to deal with nails and a cross?
Probably not. But I'll keep giving Him my all,
Keep striving to be more and more like Jesus,
Who saved those who believe from the fall.

A writer Needs to write

Okay, so I'm finally moving into the digital age. I'm starting a blog. As long as I can remember, (and if you count the stories the parents and grandparents tell, even before that), I've been a writer. Before I could write, I was a writer. However, since I had my third child, I've written about 20 e-mails for every thought about writing something. I'm in a rut and of all things, I'm teaching a writing class to impressionable young children. So that got me to thinking. I should be writing with them.
Enter this blog's purpose...for me to write. It'll be my warm-up, my publishing medium and also a way to share family moments with everyone who's not in the group of 15 people we see and talk to regularly. But mostly, it will be an opportunity to express life more artistically than I do at those momements when one child needs help with her homework, another just let in the puppy, who's covered in mud 3/4 of the way up her body, and the littlest one needs his nose wiped, diaper changed, a bottle and a nap all at the same time. In fact, I won't be publishing my exact responses to those moments at all. God knows, I've repented, and he forgives. Praise God!
Thanks for reading!